Will you quit a relationship which doesn't give you what you want? Ask yourself these questions..

Dr. Neder, an inducted minister and author of Being a Man in a Woman's World, says "If you are not getting what you want or need
from being with someone, it's time to move on," 

Though many people may view this action as selfish, others say it cannot be good for either person when one party is
unfulfilled. It is much healthier to find a relationship that works for you and gives you what you need than to cling to one that causes stress and headaches all the time.

"We all see a lot of people who are in unhealthy relationships, but due to some reasons will not or cannot leave them," says Dr. Neder. 
Some of these people use all their energies and time just to amend this sagging relationship. Life is too short for this," Dr. Neder continues. 

Before you decide to quit your relationship, it will be beneficial to ask yourself these few questions
 
1. Am I jumping to conclusions too early?

Molly BarPh.D., a clinical psychologist and also the author of Matchlines for Singles, also says that she often sees some women who assume their source of unhappiness is entirely caused by their partner. 

If you are really convinced that your spouse is the problem, and especially if you find yourself always telling him all the reasons he's blocking the way of your damn joy, then Barrow recommends that you put your thoughts down on paper for consideration.

 "Slow down the communication to a crawl," she says. This does not mean u should chastise your husband or boyfriend for 22 pages. 



2. How big is the gap between my partner and me?

We all know that Prince Charming doesn't exist. We tell ourselves our expectations are realistic. Still, the critical question we should ask ourselves about our relationships is; Is there still a passion? Do I still find him attractive for a partner? 

 How can he figure out how to keep food warm in a sub zero parking lot for his after-hockey practice potluck but forget his own child's birthday?) are often too surface to matter, says Barrow. 


Unlike clear deal breakers—long-term goals that are out of whack, an inability for your partner to celebrate your success, drug abuse or unprotected infidelity—many of those problems may be addressed if both of the parties are currently willing to make some changes, respect each other's right to disagree and can be a little bit versatile.

3. Have I taken a floating holiday...by myself?

"You completely cannot change your partner," says Barrow, "but similar to Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, if Ginger goes another direction, the dance looks completely different." What she means is to try one thing unexpected. 

By reconnecting with your friends, by limiting your commitments to your kids' school or taking a rock-climbing class at the gym could assist you to alleviate most of the tension in your relationship.

4. How big will the ripple effect be?

We know some married women who fall into a "grass is always greener and full of mojitos" daydream of Life Without Him. Maybe you have envisaged whole weekends when you can decide what to do and when to do it. 

You may have even considered the downside of how your regular may change: Paying the bills might become more of a challenge, or planning to the gym for an hour when you've got lost your inbuilt babysitter might not be attainable. 

But have you ever ruthlessly thought of post-spouse life? For one thing, your husband might want to take a lot active role in choices he previously left up to you, like play dates or extracurricular activities involving your kids.

 If you are in your 30s (and beyond), do you imagine parties stuffed with a sea of sensible and smart, funny, charming fellas? you're not wrong. Unless the men at these parties are often married, or involved with boyfriends/girlfriends, or muddling through terrible divorces themselves.

Barrow recommends that you're thinking that regarding each aspect of the daydream and compare it to what you have: a guy who knows, among different things, a way to hot-wire a Crock-Pot to an automobile dashboard. 

You may also notice that it takes months to answer a number of these questions and to determine whether the link is worth saving, not to mention months to truly save it. but  attempting to salvage the relationship once after you've got already severed ties, says Barrow, is next to not possible.